I am looking for a new church home. About a month ago, on a Wednesday night, the preacher taught about how Christians don't have problems in their life, if the faith is what it should be. He went on and on about this. How he didn't have any problems. I guess it just grated on me. Finally, I stood up, and said, "Let me make certain I understand what you are saying. You believe," I'm speaking very slowly, trying to think about how I want to say this while I talk. "That if I had a more, ..... PERFECT faith, ....... That I wouldn't be in court with my daughter?!". Everyone one hushes, and their mouths fall open. Women don't speak out in my church. But my husband isn't a believer, so I don't have any choice. I have to clarify this. He slowly looks down, then back up toward me. "Yes, that is what I believe. And I believe that if you studied it more, you would see that I am right".
Well, I finally, breathed, then sat down. I crossed my arms, and didn't say anything else the rest of the night. After the lesson was over, the preacher's wife came over to talk to me. She, and everyone else knew I was mad. I left, and I believe I have only been back once.
We are now visiting churches. I knew for a while that my beliefs were different than the preacher's, and that I was going to have to leave. But I was trying to wait till our court stuff was over. So now we are visiting other churches. And I get an email that we have court next week. So I have to decide if I will ask the preacher to go with us. He has before. Just not sure I want to be in that position, of asking.
It's hard right now to talk about what is going on with us. I don't feel I should be discussing this publically, and am paranoid that someone might recognize us. One day, when this is all over an resolved, I will write the truth. All of it.